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If you are now, or have been in the past, the care provider for a loved one, you know the mixture of feelings that you experience and the intensity of those feelings. Imagine, for a moment, those various feelings -- love, sadness, fear, hope, exhaustion, frustration, compassion, heaviness…and more. Bring all those feelings before God and read a familiar Scripture story, Mk 2:1-5,11.
When Jesus returned to Capernaum after some days, it was reported that he was at home. So many gathered around that there was no longer room for them, not even in front of the door; and he was speaking the word to them. Then some people came, bringing to him a paralyzed man, carried by four of them. And when they could not bring him to Jesus because of the crowd, they removed the roof above him; and after having dug through it, they let down the mat on which the paralytic lay. When Jesus saw their faith, he said to the paralytic, "Son, your sins are forgiven….I say to you, stand up, take your mat and go to your home." (NRSV)
You are those who carry the paralyzed person. It is hard work, exhausting. Your feet and back feel the burden. Someone must do it (whatever "it" is), however, because the person is unable to do "it" for him or herself. Caretaking is a journey, probably on a road you've never traveled before - insurance companies, health care systems, lawyers, and mountains of paperwork. The way "in" is often blocked, sometimes hopelessly so, where people are more obstacle than help. The person whom you carry, in your heart and in your arms, really needs this provision, so you have to find yet another way. Climb on a roof! Dig your way through! Make a big enough hole! Get your loved one what she needs! Do all this without hurting him even more in the process or exposing her to ridicule or bad treatment from others. At times, the needy one may not be very cooperative. She wants to turn back, complains, gets angry with you for your efforts. Because you believe in a power greater than your own, in a love deeper and wider than what you feel, you continue the caring and carrying, like the four unnamed friends of the paralyzed man, until the mission is accomplished.
Stop here for a moment. Can you really hear what the Gospel writer says?
"When Jesus saw their faith, he said to the paralytic…" The power of the miracle comes from the faith of the caregivers. Your efforts of heart and mind and spirit and body are recognized, blessed and rewarded. We don't always get a miracle at the end of our efforts in caregiving. We do what we do because it is the right and necessary thing to do. We then leave the rest to God.
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